unread letters

Dear David Spade,

The "Me love you long time" joke is not only not funny, it's been played out for over twenty years.

Kim

Dear Dean Koontz,

"My grandmother is Jewish" is not an indicator of whether you're racist or not. Your words and actions are. I've got plenty of racist relatives, and you know what? They have the good fucking sense not to broadcast it in public because they know they will get beat down for it.

No love,

Kim

Dear Zhang Ziyi,

Ugh. Please tell me you can make them un-Photoshop those ads where they gave you blue eyes.

Kim

Dear Bai Ling,

Stay crazy.

Love,

Kim